Project Exponential

Tag: relationships

  • The power of weakness

    In moments of confusion, doubt, insecurity and despair, we feel least like connecting. It becomes tempting to create distance, sit in the corner, and focus inward when feeling less than. We convince ourselves that failures and struggles are better left unspoken.

    Yet these moments often proceed sparks of brilliance and unstoppable action.

    Too often we rob ourselves of the full spectrum of human connection. An empathic word or kind touch can help us identify the right direction and move closer towards greatness. Genuine communication has the ability to convert despair into hope.

    Challenge yourself to trade feelings of unworthiness for opportunities to authentically connect. Embrace moments of weakness and maximize every facet of the human experience. Hiding seldom heals.

  • The magic of introductions

    If you’ve been the recipient of a polished introduction, you’ve probably failed to recognize its subtle magic. An introduction is a moment of alchemy; part ceremonious, part craft, part prologue. It’s quick, seemingly effortless, and gracefully leads you into an engaging discussion. In the blink of an eye, you’re feeling confident, interesting, interested, and at ease.

    A savvy intro builds a bridge between two strangers and shows them a path worth exploring. Most people know how to introduce. Few people know how to turn an introduction into magic.

    Improve your next introduction with these tips:

    Know who you are connecting and why. Your familiarity with both parties gives you the upper hand. Use this knowledge to help strangers find common ground. Add flavor and insert facts that raise eyebrows. It’s difficult to remember names, but providing a memorable story or colorful detail creates a current for conversation to sail upon.

    Most people have a gaggle of items running through their mind at any given moment. Your introduction should make it easier for two strangers to engage, not more difficult. Be explicit, direct, and clearly state the intention behind your introduction.

    Build a platform. Your introduction sets the tone for conversation to follow. Help those who are meeting each other for the first time enter a comfortable, balanced space. By speaking confidently, clearly, and warmly, you’ll create an environment that’s prime for establishing rapport.

    Exit gracefully. Sometimes an introduction is so fantastically successful, you’re doing a disservice by sticking around. Other times, two individuals might struggle to get conversation off the ground. Tune into what’s needed for genuine connection — and know when to leave.

  • Turn small talk into real talk

    Ask.

    Bring thoughtful, open-ended questions to the table. Your prompts can help shape the conversation at hand. If your delivery is honest and curious, you’ll be met with an equally forthright response.

    Be patient.

    It’s common to feel nervous, get antsy, want to head for the door or look for a new group. The juice comes after the squeeze. Stay where you are. Be present. You don’t need to work the room. A handful of intimate conversations may be more valuable than a dozen superficial pleasantries.

    Get vulnerable.

    Approach topics that may feel “too close for comfort.” Reveal parts of yourself. Talk passion. Divulging unknown talents and interests will encourage others to do the same.

    Tailor your environment.

    Your setting can impact your chatter. In a crowded room? Pull a stranger outside or find a quiet corner. Use elements of your setting to feel comfortable and at ease. Find the space that works for you.

    Relax.

    If you notice you’re fidgety, have a seat and relax. Smile. You don’t need to force anything. Be genuine. Be you. You’ll attract deeper conversations when you’re feeling settled and grounded.

    Lead by example.

    Set the pace for where the conversation will head. Answer questions with compelling details instead of generic responses. Talk about things that matter. The people who aren’t interested will leave. That’s OK.

  • Assemble your Dream Team

    The company you keep can be a single-handed propelling force in your life. With the right team of people by your side, you can maximize your potential and surpass both professional and personal goals.

    Assemble your own Dream Team by looking for these key players:

    The Mentor – Someone who’s been there. This is a person you respect and admire. They remind you to look at the big picture. You see their life and think “That’s what I want.”

    An Advisee – A person you can mentor. They are eager to learn from you and respect your work. Your willingness to teach them and spend time with them affirms your own knowledge and skills, even reminding you where you’ve come from and the lessons you’ve learned along the way.

    Your Advocate – No matter what circumstance you find yourself in, you need someone who fights for you and honors what you stand for.

    An Equal – A colleague or friend who is in your same boat. You challenge each other to become the best you can possibly be. Compare notes, support each other, get competitive when it’s beneficial.

    A Neutral – Someone with no direct investment in your life or work. This is a person who can provide an outside perspective when needed.

    The Wildcard – The Wildcard is just that — wild. This person is in an industry completely different than yours. They keep you on your toes and expose you to new experiences and people. Things are never boring when they are around.

    Supporting Stars: You need at least one or two people who can support your work and help you prioritize the bigger picture. These are folks you feel comfortable delegating work to, individuals you trust when you need to head out of town.

    Common traits found in each key player:

    • passion
    • vulnerability
    • inspiration
    • communication skills
    • curiosity and wonder
    • sense of adventure
    • excitement
    • joy
    • authenticity
    • trustworthiness

    The people surrounding you can make the difference between pushing beyond your limits and settling for less. Find those who push you.

  • 7 ways to up your game by meeting people

    1. Connect with other industries.

    Spending time with professionals who excel in industries other than your own can help you discover new approaches in your own line of work. Step outside of your immediate field, identify transferrable skills, and work together on complementary initiatives.

    2. Discuss things that aren’t familiar.

    Learn new terms and expand your horizons by venturing from typical conversation starters. A learned tidbit may assist you in building rapport with a future business partner.

    3. Ask questions.

    The right questions can turn a mundane introduction into a lasting impression, and most people are eager to talk about themselves to those willing to listen. Ask open ended questions about thoughtful topics to get the ball rolling.

    4. Spend time outside of the office.

    Shared experiences in unexpected environments can build relationships in unique ways. People often display varying characteristics depending on the situation; you may need to encounter an individual in many settings before identifying their true character.

    5. Get to know their priorities.

    An individual’s priorities can be a valuable window into their life. See if you can determine what contributes to their success and drives their work.

    6. Unite through humanity.

    Be forthright about your challenges. Moments of authenticity and vulnerability can be scary, but they connect us on a much deeper level than superficial pleasantries. Dare to be open; the response might surprise you.

    7. Brainstorm.

    Use networking opportunities as brainstorming sessions. Explore new ideas. Find news ways to look at old situations. Help each other. Innovate and create together. A stranger can offer a removed perspective to obstacles you regularly encounter.

  • Disappointing relationships? It could be you.

    I often hear the following:

    • My relationships aren’t fulfilling.
    • I’m not meeting the right people.
    • I’m not as connected as I’d like to be.
    • My employees don’t respect me.
    • My team isn’t as close as when we first began.
    • I’m not introduced in the way that I’d like.
    • I can’t find people who share my interests.

    It’s easy to place the blame on outside factors and fault something external, something beyond our control — a difficult situation, a partner’s deficit, the inability of a client to clearly communicate. The challenging route is an active one, requiring self-discipline and honest assessment. For example:

    • How do I represent myself across different areas of my life (to friends, acquaintances, strangers, colleagues, my family)?
    • Are the activities I participate in an accurate representation of my innermost dreams and ambitions?
    • Do I frequent similar kinds of situations expecting different results?
    • Am I investing time and intention to create meaningful relationships?
    • Do I carefully and thoughtfully communicate with others?

    Self-analysis can be trying, confusing, and difficult to navigate; however, it is an essential step in identifying the roles we create in our lives.

    How do you contribute to common perceptions of your character and personality? What behaviors do you repeat that fail to serve you in your most valued personal and professional relationships?

    Most often, the gate towards fulfilling, meaningful connection begins with you.